You Uncool Performative Dorks Drove Up The Price Of Porsches And It’s Ruining The Vibe

I am a dedicated life-long Porsche homer from way back in the day. I bought my first Porsche, a 1983 944 in the most disgusting shade of gold-beige imaginable called Zermatt Silver, when I was 23 for $1,500. I learned a lot about driving in that car, and I loved it dearly. I’ve had about a dozen of them since then. I bought mine cheap, and I’m mad that they’re worth more now. That’s not the vibe, man. Former Jalop Rory Carroll recently published this piece at his new home Alloy about how he kind of fell out of love with his old air-cooled 911, and it definitely struck a chord with me.

Rory had this to say about it: 

In 2026 if you have a large amount of disposable income–and if you want to be seen as a person of taste and discernment who doesn’t mind getting their hands dirty, and who, in fact, might luxuriate in the smells, sounds and sensations of an old car, if you want to convey a certain devil-may-care, high-status Southern California romantic vibe–you can buy an old 911.

Ferdinand “Ferry” Porsche Junior, once said while standing over a concours field of Porsche Club members making their 356s and 911s shine, “Our cars are meant to be driven. Not polished.” That sentiment is practically gone from the Porsche community. Lately every discussion with Porsche owners devolves into a competition over who spent more on customized options, how they got an allocation, or how much the car is worth. Stop trying to turn car culture into day trading, dingus. Buy cars you like and drive them. 

These are explicitly driver’s cars, not collector pieces to shuttle to a cars and coffee once a month. Stop being a dork and be cool instead.

This has been a topic of some contention lately in the car community. It’s been bubbling under the surface for a while, but James Pumphrey of Speeed on YouTube recently came out and said what some of us have been thinking, “Hot take, Porsches aren’t cool anymore. Not in 2026 they’re not.” and he’s right. He later went on Spikes Car Radio to discuss it, and only improved his argument.

The wrong people have come in to the biosphere and they’re running roughshod over everything that used to be fun about driving a Porsche. It feels like a grimy old neighborhood that the speculators and flippers have committed to gentrifying. Singer re-skinning what was once a $20,000 964 Carrera 2 is exactly the same thing to me as a flipper putting vinyl faux wood flooring in a mid-century duplex and painting everything grey. You’re pulling the soul out, exchanging it for dollars, and driving everyone who was into these cars out of the market. I hate that my cars cost me as much as they do in insurance every month, I really wish the values would go back to normal. 

Brian Scotto recently dedicated an episode of his podcast to trying to figure out how to make Porsches cool again. It’s a good listen, and I think they come to some good conclusions. 

Porsche built its street cred the hard way, with decades of endurance racing victories and continuing to dump engineering resources into the 911 platform that barely changed for 30 years. The cars were expensive because they were hand-assembled and engineered with motorsport precision, not because they were comfortable or luxurious, or even particularly fast. These aren’t watches, sneakers, or Birkins, they’re built to be driven, to be used, to be enjoyed. 

Cards on the table, I bought my 1997 Boxster for $7,500, my 1976 912E for $12,000, my 2001 911 Turbo for $32,000, and my 2013 Cayenne Diesel for $21,000. I paid cash for all of them, and I don’t give a crap what they’re “worth” because I’m not selling. I’ll keep the three sports cars forever, and I’ll drive the Cayenne until it doesn’t make sense to keep fixing it anymore. I don’t put a dollar value on these cars anymore, I measure how good they are, how many miles driven, who I’ve connected with over them, and where they’ve taken me. Cars are not, or at least they shouldn’t be, collector-grade value holds. Miles equal memories, so get out there and start driving them, you insufferable dinguses. 

I am certainly guilty of having lowered and debased myself in the topic of spec and value in the past, but I’ve lately dedicated my efforts to steering clear of the conversation. I hate talking about what a car sold for on BaT, or what I think I could get for my cars. I don’t care, man. Take your flipper attitude somewhere else. Buy it for life. 

I know this comes off as me saying I’m better than you, or my love for these cars is more pure than yours, but that’s not it at all. I love Porsche because of the history, the motorsport domination, the genuinely cool people who drive them, and most importantly because they’re fun to drive and easy to work on. I hope you learn to love them in the same way. If you come up to me at a car show and start talking about how much something is worth, I’m going to walk away. That’s boring. Be better.